Your Beard: 15 Things Your Dad Didn’t Tell You (Part 1)



Your beard is considered face candy among women, but there are so many lesser-known facts about the art of “bearding” that your dad may not have told you. To fill you in on everything you have been missing out on all of this time, we have finally brought you this handy little article! Don’t forget to come back soon for our part two article, featuring the top eight things that your dad didn’t tell you about your beard!

Number Fifteen: Terminology

For those of you who like to get fancy with your facial grooming, it is only fitting to use the proper terminology. The art of shaving can be described as pogonotomy while the growing of a beard is deemed to be pogonotrophy.

Number Fourteen: The Beard Tax

Peter the Great, the favored Russian ruler, tried to impose on his people the well-to-do appearance of a clean shaven face. To enforce this concept, he imposed a tax on beards. For 100 rubles, the richest citizens could attain a “beard license”, which was a medallion that read “The beard is a useless burden.”

Number Thirteen: The Plot on Castro’s Beard

During the tensions with Cuba in the ‘60s, the CIA thought up some very out-of-the-box techniques to derail Castro’s power. To sully his public image, the masterminds over at the CIA planned to take out the man’s beard. The theory was to grab hold of his shoes when he sent them to be polished and to fill them with thallium salts (a depilatory). However, the plan was never put into action.

Number Twelve: The Metal Beards

In the days of ancient Egypt, it was common for people to don metallic false beards to dress up for important occasions. They were called postiches and were worn by both men and women, most often in the event of solar eclipses.

Number Eleven: Female Facial Hair

In an ancient legend, it is said that the patron saint of unhappily married women, Wilgefortis, owed her fate to the growing of a beard. When commanded to marry the king of Sicily, whom she didn’t love, the Christian daughter of the king of Portugal prayed to her god to prevent her from marrying him. In turn, she soon began to grow a beard. The wedding was called off, and the father was so angered that he crucified his daughter.

Number Ten: Slang Terms

When growing a beard, there are a variety of slang terms that can be associated with this facial hair. A “beard” can sometimes be used to describe a person who plays the role of an unknown homosexual, or can also describe someone who places a bet for a horse trainer. A “crimea” is a little beard, and a “doorknocker” is a beard that runs just below the jawline. Additionally, saying that you have a “crumb in your beard” might lead people to believe you are drunk.

Number Nine: A Manly Beheading

In 1535, the notorious Sir Thomas More was beheaded in front of his people. However, before going through with this fateful action, he calmly moved his beard aside from the guillotine and claimed that it had “never committed any treason”. Don’t forget to come back soon for our part two article, featuring the top eight things that your dad didn’t tell you about beards!

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